I miss having the desire and ability to write.
I guess you could say I have had months and months of writer's block. No subject interested me and sadly, I'm not sure what subject interests me lately. A lot has changed in my life and I've been re-evaluating many things.
My only obsession lately has been organizing my room and throwing everything away. Want to know how much progress I've made? None. I made piles and piles of stuff to go through and they are still sitting there waiting to be touched. I've been in this weird mood where I almost want to light my room on fire and start over - in other words, I would find it much more useful to take everything out of my room and then only bring back what I want in there. The rest is thrown away. Maybe it's the feeling of starting a new chapter and I feel too much clutter.
I've been looking into moving out of my house and checking out various apartments and condos. I've been trying to work out a budget to see what I can afford and if I can manage living on my own instead of living in my parent's basement. Truly, free rent is great and getting the occasional free meal is awesome too. However, living with my parents is crushing me socially. My family still thinks I'm 9 years old instead of 25 and when I finally start going out or I'm trying to establish more independence in my life, they panic and want me to stay home. It's time to try something new. It's time to live on my own.
I've been having all kinds of health issues lately. Not sure what the hell is going on. I know one of my problems is acid reflux, but there are many others. I have spent at least $200 in the past 2 weeks on various doctor visits, antibiotics, supplements, foods, etc just to try to get better. I'm going to wait things out for a little while before I consider getting more blood tests or body scans.
I'm still not sure what I want to do for school. Part of me says "Art! Do art!" The other side of me says "Be practical!" I hate every practical subject though. I'm starting to consider teaching. I'm still considering Graphic Design, Illustration, Animation, Anthropology and Psychology. There are days where I want to sell everything I have and just live in a forest...maybe Yellowstone even. So, if I decide to go to school this semester. I'm taking art classes and a biological anthropology class. I think I'm going to minor in Chinese. I miss the language so much. It's still there - buried very deep. I realized this when listening to some Chinese music I had on my ipod and realizing I could understand some of it still. Maybe next Fall I will sign up for a Chinese class and see how I do. When it comes down to it, I am still drawn to learning languages and doing art. Maybe I should become a hippie. Ha!
